Originally published by Judith Sherven, PhD on LinkedIn: Wanting To Do Something VS Actually Doing It
Whether you’re a manager, owner, or employee these questions apply equally:
*** How often do you find yourself withdrawing from, pushing off, or totally ignoring tasks you’ve claimed were important?
*** When your to-do list includes major efforts as well as smaller tasks, how often do you find yourself taking care of the “small stuff” first?
*** If you were to commit yourself to the major efforts all the time, knowing the small stuff will be taken care of or fall away, how would this impact your career, the growth of your team and/or the company?
And one final question: have you enjoyed answering these questions, or are you saying something to yourself like, ‘Yeh, yeh, yeh, more psychobabble blah blah, what does she know about success much less the demands of my job?’
I’m guessing if you are in the habit of dodging the kinds of “bullets” that lead to major triumphs which lead to great success you’re not wild about pinning yourself down about this issue otherwise known as “procrastination.”
Because all too often we humans, for a wide variety of reasons, say we want to do something, and in the moment we mean it, but then we don’t actually do it. We cheat ourselves. We deny ourselves. We abandon who we really are in favor of some inner gremlin that infected our identity when we were quite young, long before we had the conscious ability to question it and keep it out.
On a large public scale, think about all of the super stars whether in sports, entertainment, or politics that have self-destructed whether through “accidental” suicide or publicly humiliating behavior. The list is endless.
My husband Jim Sniechowski, PhD (also a LinkedIn Influencer) and I use this truth in coaching executives: “Everyone is succeeding at all times. The question is: at what?”
So when you claim you want to do something, that you intend to do something, especially when it’s an important “something” AND you don’t do it....ask yourself.....what are you succeeding at?
Our generic term for this behavior is “The Fear of Being Fabulous.” Does that resonate with you? If so, you may want to check out our website http://OvercomingTheFearOfBeingFabulous.com
And if you want a related case study analysis of Whitney Houston’s life and death, be sure to read our book What Really Killed Whitney Houston.
Your comments please!
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Judith Sherven, PhD and her husband Jim Sniechowski, PhD http://JudithandJim.com have developed a penetrating perspective on people’s resistance to success, which they call The Fear of Being Fabuloustm. Recognizing the power of unconscious programming to always outweigh conscious desires, they assert that no one is ever failing—they are always succeeding. The question is, at what? To learn about how this played out in the life of Whitney Houston for example, and how it may be playing out in your own life, check out their 6th book: http://WhatReally KilledWhitneyHouston.com