Nov. 13—I shared the tale with you some time ago about the fellow who had accompanied his wife to one of those all-you-can-eat, buffet-style dinner parties sponsored by the company she worked for.
"That's the fifth time you've gone back for more food," the wife whispered to her gluttonous husband. "Doesn't that embarrass you?"
"Not at all," he said with a grin. "I keep telling them I'm getting more food for you."
The Bible warns us that we're to mind our manners when attending company dinners, especially with the big boss there.
"When you sit down to eat with a ruler, consider diligently what is before thee. and put a knife to thy throat if thou be a man given to appetite. Be not desirous of his dainties, or his most choice foods" (Proverbs 23:1-3).
If you're sitting across the table from the big cheese, you'd do well to focus not on what is before you but on who is before you.
As a reporter years ago, I watched two gubernatorial candidates who were attending the same dinner. One didn't take even a bite of food but instead was entirely focused on the people at that dinner. He shook hands with them. He chatted with them. He laughed with them. No one escaped his attention.
The other sat down at a table and ate, talking only with those seated next to him.
As you might have guessed, the man who won the election was the one who focused on the people, not the food at that dinner.
In my days as a pastor, I was often encouraged to sit down and eat at dinners. Sometimes, I did. But most often I didn't, because it was my job to chat with the attendees.
When I did eat, I always tried to follow Deborah Ruddell's advice included in her poem called, "A Vulture's Guide to Good Manners." This is what she said:
I never never never
put my elbows on the table,
and my face will never show it
if my tummy feels unstable.
I never tell a story
when my beak is full of food,
or eat a sprig of broccoli
that hasn't been well chewed.
I never leave the table
until I've been excused.
When someone breaks the gravy boat,
I never act amused.
I never spit my food out.
I'm never ever late.
But when I come to dinner,
I always clean my plate.
Now that is one mannerly vulture. and when he makes multiple trips back through the buffet line to fill his place, I bet that he doesn't say it's for his wife.
Reach Roger Alford at 502-514-6857 or rogeralford1@gmail.com.