When your young child gets invited to a classmate’s birthday party, he or she will likely be overwhelmed with excitement. Meanwhile, you can’t help but wonder, “Wow much should I spend on a gift?”
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You don’t want to spend too little and have the gift reflect that you’re cheap, but you also don’t want to spend too much and risk making the birthday child’s parents (or any other parents) uncomfortable. To answer this question and find out what other points of etiquette you should brush up on before the youthful celebration, GOBankingRates consulted industry experts.
Here’s everything you need to know.
How Much You Should Logically Spend
“This is such an important question as for many years when your children are younger, this will need to be a line-item on your budget,” said nationally known etiquette expert and owner of Mannersmith, Jodi RR Smith.
“Without any information, the lazy answer is $20. But the true answer is it depends. For those with bigger budgets or in tiny social circles, the answer may be $50 or more.”
How To Discreetly Find Out How Much You Should Spend
“If you are a new parent and/or new to the school or neighborhood, ask other parents, especially those with older children,” said Smith. “The way to ask is not what they spend, but what do people usually give as gifts. If you ask a few different people, you will be able to figure out the typical spend from there and then scale up or down to match your budget. For your child’s BFF, you may spend more than for a lunchtime acquaintance.”
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What Should You Buy as a Birthday Gift?
“When you RSVP, ask if there are any toys/gifts that are not permitted and find out what they are really into,” said Pamela Eyring, president of The Protocol School of Washington. “Think items such as Legos, bath toys or stuffed animals.”
Smith agrees that it’s a good idea to find out ahead of time what type of gift would be appropriate.
“A bit of intelligence gathering is important,” Smith said. “Some parents, especially of young children, can be persnickety. Ask a few questions about what the child likes to do or if there is anything the parent does not want in their home. A crafting kit may seem like a good idea, until you find out the parent despises glitter. A doll or army figures may seem like a good idea, until you find out the parent eschews normative gender toys. A gift certificate to a local ice cream shop may seem like a good idea, until you find out the parent promotes an all-natural only diet.”