The #1 Rule of “NO”
Originally published by James Altucher on LinkedIn: The #1 Rule of “NO”
I have to say No.
I'm feeling hate. And despair. But I'm scared to say "No".
"No" feels like I'm saying, "I will never succeed". I'm scared to say it.
To say "No" means: maybe hurting someone who will then trash me. Am I turning down opportunity?
Will the gods of good fortune no longer look at me with hope and optimism?
And what will I do with my "no". Will I just stay home and binge watch TV? Will I waste the opportunity?
But I hate airports. And I hate dinners. And, in general, I'm better off without too many people. I like to have my core three or four people. Maybe five.
But a dinner? Or fly to talk? Or get pitched a business in "just five minutes of your time" coffee?
Or "can I just call you?"
The other day, a well known entrepreneur wrote me and said he had a great opportunity. "Maybe billions!"
But I don't want to talk to him. I simply can't pick up the phone and call him.
And now I have the opportunity to talk to 10,000 people at a conference. Maybe I can use it to practice standup in front of 10,000 people.
They want to know right now: "Yes!" or "No!" "Please say YES!"
But I want to say "No".
I don't want to go to an airport, security, customs, a car, a hotel, speak for 30 minutes, turn around and go to airports etc. Three days out of action for 30 minutes of nervousness.
Here's the RULES OF NO:
Two out of these three have to trigger for me to say YES:
- KNOWLEDGE: Will I learn something
- FUN: Is it fun
- MONEY: Is it financially worthwhile.
So I'm saying "no" to the 10,000 people.
I won't learn anything new from speaking. It's not fun to fly for a day, speak for 30 minutes, fly home for a day. And I have no financial benefit.
Hmmm, maybe this even applies to relationships? Who should I be with? And what do I offer? (So they don't say "no" to me!)
So what should I do with all that free time? Maybe write a book?
Or binge watch "Billions" on Netflix?
I have to figure out what to say "Yes" to.
Or maybe just sleep. Mmmmm. I love to sleep. And daydream of all the things I will say "Yes" to.
----
Follow me on Social Media: